Trust Me
by Ariel Princess of the Sea
Summary: Han tries to get his son to leave the dark side and come home. All Han wants is to protect his family. But Ben has been protecting his family for longer than anyone knows. A TFA fix-it fic. Because Han and Leia (and their son) deserved better.
1. Chapter 1

"Ben!" Han could hear his thunderous voice echo through the room. The vast vacuum of the room amplified the silence that followed. His son, Ben, had stopped where he stood. But he hadn't turned around. Everything froze.

Han moved. He steadily made his way onto the platform that his beloved son was standing further down on. The clang of his footsteps on the unsupported metal seemed to jar his son into slowly turning around to face him.

The face that met him wasn't his son. A mask of darkness met his gaze. Han had recognized the similarities of Ben's mask to that of Darth Vader the first time he saw it on Takodana. The similarities, although eerie, had a huge flaw. Ben wasn't Darth Vader, no matter how hard he tried. Ben was _his son._ Ben still had him and Leia to love and protect him. Han heard Ben's quick breaths through the mask and internally blanched. This was not Ben. This mask was not his son. This darkness was not his son. Ben was in there, somewhere.

Han had promised Leia he would try to bring their son back. If he had stayed in the shadows, passed up this opportunity to bring Ben back, he'd never be able to look Leia in the eyes ever again. He would never forgive himself. So Han gathered up his courage and carefully walked over to where his son was still standing. The fact that Ben was still standing there, was a good sign. Someone who had completely denounced his family and the Light wouldn't have been affected by his father calling his name. Since his son hadn't fled, Han reasoned that a part of him was still in there. Even if it was the smallest particle, Ben Solo was still alive.

 _There's good in him, I know it._

Leia's words echoed in his mind as he realized it must be true. Han stopped a few feet from Ben, still wary that he may run from him. When Ben stood still, Han decided to push his luck.

"You don't need that mask with me. Please take it off."

The voice modulator on Ben's mask crackled, chilling Han to the bones and reminding him of the terror he and Leia had endured on Bespin at the hands of Darth Vader. "What do you think you'll find?" The modified voice inquired.

Han swallowed. "The face of my son." His voice broke slightly on his last word, and Han shifted his feet, trying to dispel his emotions.

How could this have ever happened to his family? Why his son? He missed Ben and Leia. He missed the times when they were a happy family, before Snoke. It didn't feel right, their little family scattered among the stars. They were all lost in their own way, without the light of each other to guide them home. The light may be blinding, and scary, but they had to face the light. It was time to be found. It was time for the lost stars to come home. It was time for his family to be a whole again.

Han held his breath as he watched his son's gloved hands reach up to pull his helmet off. A good sign, Han thought. He was cooperating. This might be a little easier than he initially thought. The sight of his son's face inflicted him with conflicting feelings. It was his _son_ , but his son was broken right now.

"Ben, come home." He pleaded while searching the eyes of his son. He knew those eyes. Eyes that looked so much like Leia's. When Ben was a baby, Han was so thrilled to find that their little boy had Leia's eyes. He had spent hours looking into Leia's eyes, and he knew what kind of love they held. And then his son had them, and they held the same kind of unconditional love. What had happened to his family?

"Your mother misses you. I miss you."

Ben's eyes were hard and blank. They didn't react to Han's words. Panic gripped Han's chest. He changed gears. "Snoke is using you. You know this."

Han watched Ben's eyes flash and body tense. Han had hit a nerve. "Deep down, you know this isn't right."

Han watched as his son's eyes bore into him, a mist forming around the edges. Ben's body began to shake as a tremor started in his right hand. _Pull him out of there._ Han pushed. "Please. Just, come home."

His son broke eye contact with him, boring his eyes into the ground. Quietly, emotionally, Ben sobbed, "I'm being torn apart." Han nodded at him. This was something he knew. The Light and the Dark were warring over who would have possession over him. A small part of him rejoiced that here was still light in him. Han didn't want him to be in pain, but Ben needed to come back.

"Focus on that, Ben. The light will guide you home."

Ben choked on his breath and he slowly raised his eyes to Han. Ben's shaking hand reached to his hip, curling his fingers around his lightsaber. Taking if off his belt, Ben raised it in front of Han in an offering. Han should've recoiled at the murderous weapon, but he held his son's gaze, holding on to blind hope and trust in his son.

"Will you help me?"

Han was quick to answer. "Anything."

Han laid his hand in the weapon. He would bear this burden with his son. This was his duty as a father. Ben stared at him and quietly, almost to the point where Han couldn't hear, spoke to him.

"Trust me." His mouth moved.

Han stared at his son and saw that his eyes were determined, wide, and open. Han nodded. It may be his downfall, but he would do whatever Ben needed. Live. Heal. Die.

Ben's grip tightened on the light saber, leading to Han's own firm grip on the weapon. Ben's face changed. A whoosh and bright flash of red light caused Han to suck in a breath in surprise. With such stillness, the sudden movement shocked Han.

A familiar roar settled in his ears and echoed off the chrome walls. All at once, Han registered what had happened. He looked down to find Ben's lightsaber looking oddly short. It was pointed at him. But no, he corrected himself, the lightsaber wasn't uncharacteristically short. It was _inside_ Han, like a ghost passes through solid objects.

Han was stabbed with the lightsaber. Through the chest. Han tried to process what Ben had done. His own _son_ had stabbed him. In the chest. A clear and obvious death blow.

He was going to die. At his son's hands. But it was okay. He would die knowing he helped his son. He would die trying to save Leia and the Resistance from the obliterating blows of the Starkiller Base. He blindly hoped that Chewie, Finn, and Rey would finish the job. He would die for his family. He would be at peace.

But something was off. Han had never been sliced by a lightsaber, but he'd been hit by a blaster too many times to count. Those blaster burns hurt like ten levels of burning hell. But Han wasn't in pain. His mind reasoned that maybe he had become numb.

No, that wasn't right. A stabbing by a lightsaber in the chest would hurt. At least until he knocked on Death's door. Han looked up at Ben. Ben's eyes were steady and open. He didn't look like a man who had just stabbed his own father. Though, Han didn't know what he had expected. Ben was leaning towards the dark side. Out of his hate and anger, he had killed his own father.

Han's hand instinctively rose to the side of Ben's face. He placed his steady hand there, silently forgiving him. He would love his son to his dying breath, no matter what he had done. It is what a father does.

Han waited for the exhaustion to overtake him and the darkness to settle around him, but he felt fine, great even. _Kriff._ Maybe death was kind.

Ben's voice floated over to Han. "Thank you."

Han tried to feel the pain, but felt nothing. And then a familiar feeling floated over him. It was a feeling he had often felt when Ben was young. The feeling came from when Luke had started training Ben in the ways of the Force, Luke had started with lifting objects. Luke had told him and Leia that this was the simplest way to get attuned to all of the living beings that contributed to the Force.

Ben, being the giggly child he was, had thought it was funny to levitate C-3PO and make him float around the house, all the while listening to 3PO's panicked words. When he got bored of moving 3PO, he started to pick up Han.

Ben would do this randomly in the coming weeks, until getting bored of levitating him as well.

That was what dying felt like. It felt like Ben was lifting him up and floating him.

Han tipped sideways and felt his breath catch.

Over the edge, Han felt himself fall into oblivion.

When Han opened his eyes again, he found himself laying on a cold, hard floor. He laid still, waiting for the pain to overtake his system, but when he didn't, he raised his head up to look at the damage the lightsaber had made. But there was nothing. No blood. No pain. Nothing.

Han's hands tore at the buttons on his shirt, opening it to find no injury to his torso. His skin was smooth. Smooth and normal. But….Ben had _stabbed him._ He had seen it. How could he be alive?

The truth crashed down on Han like an avalanche, pinning him to the cold floor. Ben had used the force to make everyone believe that he had killed his father. That floating feeling he felt was Ben guiding him to safety.

His son faked his death.

He was alive.

But what did this mean?


	2. Chapter 2

A/N:

Thanks to dancingkaylee for being a great beta and best friend and yelling in my face when I write something that gives you feels! :D

I've got a bunch of chapters all outlined and brainstormed...I just need to...write it. So stay tuned!

Again a sorta-short chapter. I kinda wanted to build a base of where everyone was before really getting into it. (Maybe more for my own benefit than yours...) But don't worry, there will be longer chapters!

Also, if something doesn't work/belong in the SW universe, I apologize. I'm trying to do my research and get things right, but since the movie isn't on DVD yet, I have to rely on my memory of the movie...and Google.

Please R&R!

LEIA

Leia's nerves were wound so tightly she could barely catch a breath. The Resistance, and the planet they were standing on, could be nothing but debris at any given moment. The Starkiller was currently living up to its namesake. It was killing a star for its energy source to power up The First Order's ultimate weapon. Resistance engineers didn't know how long it would be until the base was fully operational. They only had mere speculation to go off of.

The Resistance's command team was standing in a circle around the holo of the Starkiller, watching their outnumbered X-wings attempt to destroy the giant planet. The voices of their brave pilots yelling out tactical plans and ideas over their comms were being broadcasted inside the room. They hadn't heard anything from the _Falcon_ since it had touched down on the base. How Han had pulled that off concerned Leia. He said she wouldn't like it, and her mind had since gone wild with all of the possibilities. She _knew_ how reckless Han was, from many years of first-hand experience. She just hoped he made it back in one piece so that she could find out how he did it and then berate him for it. _Just like old times._

It didn't escape Leia's mind that Han hadn't come _back._ He had simply just been at the wrong place at the wrong time when the First Order and Resistance had battled on Takodana. _Or the right place at the right time._ Leia thought. She had told herself to not get her hopes up. Han might not even stay around after he got back from Starkiller Base. It had been three long years since she had seen him last. _Gods_ she missed him. She missed his presence. His snarky come-backs. She was so lonely without him. When Ben had turned Dark, she felt lost and betrayed. Han was there with his own emotions running high. It only made sense that they took it out on each other. But however much Han and her fought, she knew the harsh words weren't sincere. It was like sparring with a lightsaber. You didn't mean to hurt your partner, it was merely a work out, to dispel stress and anxiety. But her and Han had always been that way. They fought. They made up. Even while fighting, Leia felt how much Han loved her. It was never about that. Ben's turn had just left them both too emotional. Too raw. When they found out what Ben had done to the other Padawans Luke was training…it was bad. Both had taken their anger and sadness out on each other. They were too alike in that department.

And then Han had blamed Luke for not keeping an eye on Ben. For not stopping his turn to the Dark Side. Luke had agreed with Han.

Luke left shortly after.

Luke's disappearance left Han feeling guilty about placing blame solely on Luke and forcing a wedge in his relationship with his best friend. Han had cried into her arms that night, babbling about how he ran Luke off and how he didn't want to do the same to her.

Later that week, Han had decided to leave.

Without having anyone to go home to, Leia had immersed herself into the Resistance. She made sure that she worked herself into the ground every night to keep the loneliness at bay. Sleep and work. That had been Leia's life for the past three years. She had kept her ears to the ground, secretly searching for any news of her broken family. A few times, spies working for the Resistance had relayed seeing Han on some backwater planet. Leia would drop everything and head to the planet Han was sighted on. But when she got there, all she would find was docking records of false ship names Han had regularly used to conceal the _Millennium Falcon_ from possible Imperial eyes when he used to run shipments for the Rebellion, and later, the Resistance _._

Leia was angry at first, upset that her husband had run away from their problems. It had taken her a while to understand that he did this for her. He wanted to spare her any additional pain. She didn't have to like it, but a small part of her melted at the thought of him trying to protect her still. Seeing him on Takodana had hardened this resolve. She could tell by the way he spoke to her that he was worried he had irredeemably ruined everything by running away. But she didn't care about that anymore. He was here now. She would rather just move forward. They lost the son. The grieved. Now it was time to get him back. To get _both_ her boys back.

Leia's nerves were frazzled. So many things could go wrong. And the lack of communication from the _Falcon_ had pitched Leia's worry to astronomical levels. Han, Chewbacca, and Finn seemed to have disabled the shields, but it wasn't doing the Resistance any lick of good. Their pilots were outnumbered by Imperial TIE fighters, and their firepower, although being the best they had, was not good enough. That and the lack of communication led Leia to believe that Han was doing something stupid and reckless. Something she would probably congratulate him for later, maybe even give him another medal of honor, but then she would swiftly smack the back of his head for his rash actions.

And Ben. Was Ben on the Starkiller? To save the Resistance and all of the lives in this system, would she be killing her only son? Gods, Leia did not want to think about that. She didn't want to have to choose between her family and her duty. She had always been very good at balancing both. Selfishly, she knew she would choose to save her son's life. That's why she had left Han with the task to bring him home if he saw their son. An impossible task, Leia knew, but if anyone could get through to Ben, it was Han. If Han didn't run into Ben, then she would take that as a sign that her son was not on the Starkiller.

But time was running out. For everyone. Their pilots were dropping like flies. It was a miracle that any of them had gotten off any shots at the shield generator.

Leia caught the gaze of Ackbar from across the holo table. His smile was grim. They both knew the odds of getting out of this situation were slim. The stakes were too high, too impossible, to reach.

An old, familiar feeling from long ago drifted through her. _Ben._ She knew his force signature anywhere. Ben had cut her off from him when he went Dark and she hadn't felt the presence of her son since.

The feeling made her heart flutter with hope. Two words swam through the connection:

 _Trust me._

Her son had contacted her! Her hope soared. _Ben, please come home._ She pleaded.

 _I cannot mother._

His voice tore at her. Gods, when was the last time she had seen her son? _Please. We miss you._

His reply was determined. _I must see this finished._

 _No, you do not. You can come home._

 _You will understand in time._

Ben cut off their conversation, then let her see what he was looking at.

 _Han!_ He had found their son!

Han Solo was standing in front of Ben, looking rather weary. Han and Ben's hands were resting side by side on Ben's red lightsaber. Leia only had a moment of stillness, before the floor was pulled out from under her.

Leia blinked as all the air rushed out of her lungs. Ben. _Ben._ She felt a jolt of pain from her shock, then a great weight crushing her heart. She couldn't pull in any air for her lungs as she was forced to watch through her son's eyes.

 _NO!_

Ben had stabbed his father through the chest with the lightsaber.

Shapes moved around her peripherals and someone grasped her arm. Leia watched helpless as Han's eyes formed tears, his wobbling hand coming up to touch her son's cheek. Leia's own eyes became blurry with tears as she recognized Han's expression. Unwavering love and forgiveness.

And then her husband fell into the darkness.

Leia watched as Ben stood there, watching Han's descent. A bright light flashed, and Leia recognized Ben was in pain. A shot had hit him. Leia felt the force connection waiver and her heart seized.

 _Ben, what have you done?_ All Leia could see was Han. Han being stabbed. Han falling. Her son. Her _son._ Leia shut her eyes. The images replayed over and over again.

 _Trust me._

Leia reached up and rubbed her eyes quickly, trying to dispel the image. Her son…

 _Your father-_

 _Is alive and safe. Trust me._

Leia was shocked to hear Ben's convicted tone. Alive? But she watched her son…

 _Ben?_

The connection ended. Leia panicked, searching and pushing her mind to find her son again. She needed to know what was going on. A hand landed on her cheek and Leia's eyes popped open. She looked up into the eyes of Admiral Ackbar, staring down at her in worry.

"General?"

Leia took a deep breath at his inquiry. "It's alright," she whispered.

"General, what happened?" A young lieutenant stepped forward to Leia's right.

The mechanical voice of Threepio spoke behind her, "Can't you see? She is absolutely frightened! Shaking to the core over our situation! Rightfully so, I'd say!" Threepio shuffled around her, "General Organa-Solo, do you need anything? Water? A blanket? Some medication?"

Leia shook her head slowly back and forth. "No, thank you, Threepio. I am quite alright."

"You were shaking quite a bit, General." Threepio observed. "I was afraid you had short-circuited!"

Leia straightened herself up. It felt like she short-circuited. So many questions were currently demanding her attention. If Han was alive…

"Threepio, I need you to do something for me."

"Anything, General." Threepio bounded forward. "What do you need assistance with?"

She lowered her voice and leaned towards the golden droid. "Comm the _Falcon._ Leave a message with Chewbacca. Tell him to _not leave_ the Starkiller Base without Han. Tell him that what he saw wasn't the truth."

Threepio's head tilted to the right. "An odd request, Princess."

"I told you, it's General now. And please just do it, Threepio."

"At once Princ-General."

"Thank you."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

HAN

How his son had done it, Han didn't know. What he was supposed to do now, Han didn't know. Why his son had saved his life, Han didn't know.

Han didn't know a lot of things right now.

He sat up slowly, searching for any broken bones or bruises, but felt no pain what-so-ever. How far he had fallen? Enough for Han to pass out and wake up in unknown territory. But not far enough to kill him. Not out of reach from his son's powerful grip.

Han felt the ground underneath him tremble. It moved through the stones as if it were living, _breathing._ Cold terror washed over him. _The Resistance._ He'd forgotten why he was here. It wasn't to catch up with his son, it was to destroy the very thing Han was standing on.

 _Kriff._

Pushing aside the confused thoughts circling his son, Han got to his feet, twisting to get a good look of where he was. An arched ceiling of stone rose above him, and the same cold stone laid under his feet. He shivered. A single light source lit the stone he was surrounded in.

There was an archway behind him, and a long stretch of darkness in front of him. Trotting over to the archway, Han peered around the corner, finding a metal scaffolding. Beyond the metal was the vastness. The empty pit that he had fallen in stood in front of him, stretching down at least thirty more levels and upwards endlessly. Han had wondered again how far he possibly fell. He would have to somehow find his way back up if he wanted to get out of this death trap. He could comm Chewie and get his furry companion to meet him somewhere. Patting his pants, Han was disappointed to find that his comm was in his jacket that he left in the lift. _Reckless._ That's what Leia would tell him later when he told her about this. And Han was determined to see her annoyed face directed towards him. He had to get out of here.

His blaster, _thank gods,_ was still attached at his hip. Was he supposed to wait for Ben to collect him? Or was he supposed to take his chances to try and find a way out?

Han was positive now that there was still good in him. Leia had been right about Ben all along. He felt guilty that he hadn't listened to her earlier. He thought he'd learn by now that Leia was always right. Ben had saved his life. But why fake his death then? Why not just let Han escape?

He couldn't wait to tell Leia of how their son had made a step towards redemption. He imagined her eyes would light up, and she would smile before her face turned smug and announced that she told him so. As much as he hated those words coming from her mouth, this time he wouldn't mind.

Another tremor shook the floor and a few of the lights on the other side of the pit flickered. _The Resistance is bombing the generators. Where I conveniently happen to be._

He could worry about that later. Right now he needed to focus on finding a way out of here. Han turned towards the dark tunnel before him. Moving to the side, Han used the wall to guide him into the darkness. There were no sounds in the tunnel except for his shoes hitting the floor and his ragged breathing as he felt his way. He could really use some of that ole' smuggler's luck right about now.

It was then that Han turned a corner. A sigh of relief left his body. There was a light at the end of the hallway. And the yellow beams highlighted the edge of a door. No, a lift _._ Han felt himself smile as he thought of his good fortune. He really hoped that he wouldn't run out of that luck anytime soon. Seemed like it was the only thing keeping him alive. That, and his son apparently. Ben had probably dropped him to this level on purpose, knowing that there was an exit at the end of the hall.

Running towards the light, Han reached the door to the lift as another tremor laced through the ground. Han shuffled inside, now thinking about how likely it was that he would get off this godforsaken planet. The odds weren't good. But when did he ever listen to the odds?

Han felt the lift shoot upwards, and his stomach dropped. Closing his eyes, he thought of Leia. How much she must hate him for leaving. How he had missed her every day he was gone. How her hair was woven in a new pattern. He knew all of her previous hairstyles like the back of his hand. And now all he wanted was to get to know this hairstyle as well.

The lift jerked Han out of his thoughts and Han prepared to jump out of the lift, fists swinging if he had to. He didn't know what laid on the other side of the door, and he might have to fight his way out. Wasn't the first time he had to fight his way out of a big imperial weapon. As the door slid open, Han was surprised to find an empty hall. Unlike the dark stone tunnel, this one was brightly lit and the walls were adorned with a sleek black metal. Pulling the blaster out of its place in his holster, Han lumbered down the hallway searching for any signs of Stormtroopers. But there was no one in sight, and Han wondered if this was also a part of Ben's doing.

Down the hall, Han reached a fork in the hallway. To his right was another dark hallway and to his left was a brightly lit hallway. Putting his blind faith that his son was showing him the way, Han turned left. There was no one in sight, but Han kept himself on high alert. He'd had too many plans backfire to just walk around willy-nilly.

A few more turns down lit hallways led Han right back where he started; staring out over the bridge he and his son had recently faced-off on. Han felt a shiver run through his bones. He was immensely glad he couldn't remember falling off of that bridge. Han had half expected that Chewie would be where he had left him. But like the rest of the Starkiller, the giant room was empty. Well, empty except for the ticking bombs he and Chewie had placed. _Kriff!_ Han didn't know how long he was unconscious, so he wasn't sure how long he'd have until the generators blew. Probably best if he pretended they were gonna go off any second now.

His grip on his blaster tightening, Han jogged to the staircase, taking great care not to set off any of the bombs he had placed underneath it. It wasn't until he reached the top of the stairs, did he see the first person he had run across on the base.

 _Chewie._

Chewbacca roared in greeting and before Han knew it, he was being engulfed into a big Wookie hug.

"Chewie you big lug, what are you still doing here! These could blow any minute!"

" _I had come to find you, cub."_ Chewie ruffed at Han. Han's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

"How did you know I was alive?"

" _There was a comm message on the_ Falcon _from Leia telling me you were still alive."_ Chewie ruffled Han's hair, and Han swatted at his paw. Chewie looked a little too overjoyed to be in a room that was a ticking time bomb. Han spun around Chewbacca and led the Wookie towards the exit. Han directed his next question back at his hairy friend.

"How in the Corellian hells did Leia know I was alive?"

" _By now I would've expected you to not underestimate your wife."_ Chewbacca guffawed a chuckle at him.

"Yeah, yeah." Han waved his hand back at Chewie. "We can discuss it later."

Chewie roared in agreement.

"Let's get off this planet before we're done for. Are Rey and Finn on the _Falcon_?"

Chewie grunted a negative. This stopped Han in his tracks. "Where are they?"

" _We need to pick them up or else they will not get off this planet."_

"Well, let's go get 'em." Han started moving again, tracing his steps back to the door that led to the snowy surface of the planet. Once in the door, Han looked around for the jacket he had disposed of when he first got there, but it was nowhere in sight.

Chewie noticed his search and said, _"I had brought it back to the_ Falcon _as I thought you were dead. When I found out otherwise, I was too excited to remember to bring it back for you. I apologize, as it will be very cold outside."_

Usually, Han would yell at Chewie for being so stupid because _Kriff_ it was going to be a cold journey back. But the pain that was laced through Chewie's tone had led Han to merely nod at the Wookie. His best friend had thought he was dead for a short span of time. He didn't want to upset the Wookie anymore today.

When Chewie hit the door latch, snow and frozen air hit Han like an avalanche. "Holy fucking Hoth!" Han cursed. Chewbacca merely laughed and moved closer to Han, putting his arms around Han to feed off of his body heat. Seeing that moving with Chewie's arms around Han would be difficult, Chewbacca swiftly picked Han up and began to run with Han cradled to Chewie's chest.

"Woah you big oaf! Put me down!" Han protested.

Chewie looked down at the little smuggler in his arms. _"Would you rather freeze, old man?"_

"Hey! Who are you calling old? You're older than me!"

Although Han had protested, Chewbacca was right. Although it was cold in Chewie's arms, the old Wookie's body heat pulled him in like a moth to a flame.

"I guess since you're saving my life and all, I won't tell Leia that you made a move on me." Han grumbled. Chewie's laugh was drowned out by the blistering sounds of explosions. Chewie didn't turn to look, but Han knew that it was the field generator that had exploded. Ears ringing, Han realized that if he were only a few minutes slower, he'd be dead. He looked up at Chewie. "Thanks for coming back for me."

By the time Chewie had made it back to the _Falcon,_ Han couldn't feel his face. Chewbacca deposited Han on the med bunk, grabbing the emergency heat blanket from the cupboard and throwing it over the shivering smuggler. With a look that said "stay there or I'll tear off your limbs", Chewbacca moved towards the cockpit, readying the ship for flight. As if in an afterthought, Chewie grabbed Han's coat from where he had thrown it on the holochess table when he had first gotten to the _Falcon_ , and threw it at Han.

Han couldn't move to grab at it. He was shivering so badly from the cold, hoping that the cold would leak out of his body soon enough. Han felt the repulsors fire and the engine turn over as the familiar feeling of taking off resounded around him, giving Han something to think of other than the cold shaking his bones.

The feeling in Han's limbs were beginning to return when Han noticed Chewbacca run past him to the opening latch of the ship, paying him no attention. Listening as the ramp of the _Falcon_ was lowered, Han heard Chewie bark something at someone. Then the sound of Chewie and another walked up the ramp. Han saw Rey first.

" _Han!_ Chewie just told me you were alive, but I couldn't believe it!" Her beaming face was adorned with sweat and her eyes looked tired. What had she been doing?

"Takes a lot more than that to kill me, kid." Behind Rey stood Chewie holding an unconscious Finn. "Geez, what happened to him?" Asked Han.

Rey's expression turned grim. "Kylo Ren."

Han's breath left his body. "Is he alive?"

"Yeah." Rey's voice had grown small and Han took in breath as he thanked the gods that his son hadn't killed someone that he had actually grown to…accommodate.

Han noted Chewie's look and rolled off the med bunk, taking the emergency blanket with him. "Here. Put 'im here, Chewie. He needs it more than me."

Han tried his legs, and almost collapsed back down to the floor when an arm shot out to catch him. Han looked over and noticed Rey's arm was wrapped around his, steadying him.

Chewie placed the unconscious Finn onto the Med Bunk and roared at Rey to help him get the _Falcon_ up in the air. Rey led Han to the holochess table and deposited him on the bench there. She seemed to hesitate, whipping her head between him and Finn.

"Go." He whispered at her. "I'll take care of him."

Her eyebrows raised as if to say 'your injured yourself, how do you expect to take care of someone else?' and Han was reminded of Leia. Rey nodded her head and ran in the direction of the cockpit. Gods did Rey look like Leia in that moment. Han shook his head. Soon enough the _Falcon_ was in the air, and the sound of the hyper drive symbolled their entrance into hyperspace. They had gotten away.

 _Leia._

 _Leia, I'm coming home._


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Okay, I'm going to be real with you. I was totally planning on writing this chapter on Friday. But then I saw _Batman v. Superman_ and I was wrecked with the feels. If I had written it Friday, the feels would've come out in this fic, making this reunion a lot more angsty than I wanted it to be. So, you're welcome in that respect.

This is the scene all of you were waiting for, but there's still a lot to talk about and a lot to do, so stay tuned!

Also, if you have a chance, google "Star Wars expletives" it's really great.

CHAPTER FOUR

LEIA

Leia had calculated the time it would take the _Millennium Falcon_ to travel from the position previously held by the _Starkiller_ base to D'Qar. Once command had been notified of their successful mission, Leia started counting.

They had no communications from the _Falcon_ since C-3PO had sent their initial message. Leia had known that her son had gotten away from the planet's destruction, but her force connection with the rest of her family was fuzzy. She had held onto the hope that since she had not felt Han and Chewie's death with certainty, they must still be alive, travelling back to her. And so, she counted.

She tried to only focus on the numbers ticking down in her mind. The celebrations and cheering all around her was merely background noise. The Resistance had saved this planetary system, but without her loved ones, she had nothing. She doubted that she'd find new ones like she had after Alderaan. She was too old for this. Hadn't she suffered enough? She felt like the force owed her some respite. And so she held onto hope and counted.

Leia made her way to the landing platforms. She walked somberly as noise buzzed around her. She split the crowd as Resistance fighters ran around her pumped up from the adrenaline and victory. _Five standard minutes left._

The sun glared at Leia as she exited out of the main base. It took a second, but her eyes adjusted to the sight of X-Wings landing one after another. A quick scout of the area showed no signs of the Corellian Freighter, but there was still time left. The old ship, though fastest in the galaxy, could've only lifted off mere moments before the planet blew. The X-Wings evacuated as soon as the generators blew.

Leia saw Poe Dameron exit his X-Wing and jump into a pile of his pilots in celebration. The glee on his face made Leia smile ruefully. Hugs were exchanged. Exclamations were shouted. Backs were pat. Dameron ran a hand through his hair, letting out a long breath. Leia knew a lot of this victory's credit belonged to Poe, and she decided she would formally thank the boy later. He really was a great pilot. Second only to Han. Probably why the boy had always reminded her of Han. And after Han left, she had relied heavily on the young pilot to be her number one. He had always finished the missions she gave him with efficiency and effectiveness. Which was the main difference between Poe and Han. Han was incredibly effective, but very rarely efficient. Han's out-of-the-box thinking had gotten them out of a lot of tight spots in the past, but had more often gotten him and Leia into fights. Where then it left her to find a way out of their situation. But they always did. Together. She was efficient and he was effective. They had complimented each other so well.

 _Two minutes._

Leia's eyes looked towards the sky for any sign of the _Falcon_ coming into orbit. But there was nothing. She crossed her arms, hoping that the stance would keep her sane inside. She wanted to prepare herself for the worst, but she couldn't. She had to hope that her husband would come back. Like he always did, eventually.

A black speck came out of hyperspace and Leia's pulse quickened. As the ship neared closer, Leia knew it was the _Falcon._ She knew that ship anywhere. Years and years of reuniting with her husband similarly like this as he came back from missions made her positive as to what she was seeing. Her body moved on its own accord towards the large empty space where the _Falcon_ would inevitably land. She forgot to breathe as the _Falcon_ landed softly in the empty spot and the engines wound down from flight. Sounds that she had always heard in her sleep and associated with love and happiness. Because it meant that Han was back, alive and safe with her.

Leia stepped up close to the ship, watching almost as if in slow motion as the ramp was lowered. A beat later and Leia was moving. Up the familiar incline into the ship that was her constant home for so long. Leia briefly passed Chewbacca holding an unconscious Finn, but other than a knowing look at Chewie, they said nothing as they passed. A worn-looking Rey followed the two, and Leia held out a hand for the girl, giving her a supportive squeeze as she passed. Leia felt like she should've given them more of a welcoming, but there was time for that later. She needed to see her husband. She needed to see him _alive_. Right now, before her heart burst from her chest in anticipation and hope.

She rounded the corner into the galley, and her heart of lead was washed away. Han Solo was sitting on the edge of the med bunk, and noticing her arrival, let a smile rise upon his lips as his voice conveyed all his need, all of his emotions, into one word.

 _"_ _Leia."_

Leia's feet moved on their own accord as she was suddenly right in front of him, tackling him as she fit her arms around his neck and buried her face into his shoulder. His arms came around her instantly as they swayed. A resounding _umph_ left him as they toppled into the med bunk. Their holds on each other became tighter.

"Woah, sweetheart." Han laughed at her response.

Leia growled into his neck. "You vaping, nerf herding, bantha poodoo, sithspawn, crazy, old man!"

"Woah, your highnessness, who are you calling old?"

Leia's head untucked itself from his shoulder as she met his eyes. He looked just as relieved to be alive as she felt. "Out of all the names I just called you, you have the biggest problem with me calling you old?"

He shrugged and pulled her head back down to lay on his chest. "Seems to be a trend today."

Leia settled in, pressing her nose into his chest to renew her scent memory of him. Tears prickled Leia's eyes as she moved her hand over his heart. The steady _thump thump thump_ resounded underneath her hand, and she let her tears fall onto his white shirt.

"Hey, Leia, none of that. I'm alive." He soothed, running circled on his back. "Well, I'm a little cold still, but having you here is helping more than you know. Though I'd probably get a lot warmer if there were no clothes between us."

Leia wiped at her eyes and gripped his shirt, watching as her knuckled turned white from the strain. One of Han's hands came up to loosen her tight hold, and moved her hand into his.

"Sweetheart?"

"I thought you had died." She whispered, voice low and broken.

"What's new? I'm always gettin' myself into trouble. I always come back alive."

"I watched you die, Han. Through our son's eyes. As if it was _me_ who killed you."

Han's demeanor turned sober underneath her as he lifted his head slightly to push a kiss into her hair. Leia's eyes flitted shut as she relished in the feeling. _Gods, he was alive._

Han seemed to pause for a moment before replying. "He didn't."

"I know." She breathed.

She knew they needed to talk about Ben. About them. About what they were going to do now. Their world was turned upside-down when Ben went to the Dark Side. And now, it had turned again, leaving them all scattered in what they believed to be true. She only hoped that this time, she would get to keep her husband. There was so much to talk about. But right now, she was just happy to be in his arms again. The sheer panic and emptiness she felt after watching Ben kill Han through the force, left her scarred. She never wanted to feel that again. The pain reminded her of watching Alderaan burn. But unlike with Alderaan, Leia got this world back. She got Han back. Gripping his hand tighter, Han brought their joined hands to his lips, and kissed her ring finger. The finger that instead of her wedding band, now held an expensive oval gem. Han had given it to her on their twentieth wedding anniversary. When he had given it to her, she was absolutely speechless, as tears flooded her eyes and memories washed over her mind. Leia had instantly recognized the stone. It was a stone that originated from Alderaan. One of very few left out in the galaxy. Leia had sobbed that day, slipping it on her finger, and never taking it off.

This time, when Han decided to leave, she was going to fight for him to stay. And if that didn't work, she was going to stow away on the _Falcon_ and come with him. Chewie would surely help her sneak onboard.

Leia had missed this feeling of _home_ and _rightness_ being in his arms, for the past three years. And the scare of never feeling this again was causing her to hold on tight to the man sprawled underneath her.

Hold on tight.

And never let go.


	5. Chapter 5

I've been sitting on this chapter for a few days now...and I just remembered that I hadn't posted it yet. I apologize! So here we go! And thanks to my beta, Kaylee! And thanks to Kayla, who dared to say that another fanfiction gave her more feels than mine! This chapter was made specifically for her because Ben Solo is her baby.

BEN/KYLO

"Is it done?" The scratchy voice of his master echoed in the vast room. Similarly to the Starkiller Base, this room was titanic and dim, the light from the holo's figure throwing eerie shadows across the stark metallic walls.

Ben felt the weight of his mask shift as he nodded calculating the move and timbre of his voice. "Yes, master."

"And yet, I still feel conflict in you Ren." The shadowy figure leaned forward, catching him in his menacing stare.

"Through the force I feel those I share blood with. They are grieving. I feel it through the force. It shall pass soon." Ben stood defiantly in front of the master, never flinching. The truth of his conflict was only known to a few. Him, his uncle, and now his father.

"See that it does, Ren. In the wake of the destruction of our most recent base, it is imperative that we get operating again."

"Do you wish to build another Starkiller, Master?"

"I have something a little more indestructible in mind."

"Master?"

The ghostly figure leaned back in its chair, a menacing smile cutting across his face. "All in good time, Ren."

The holo projection shut off, cascading the room into pure darkness. Blind in the new blackness, he paused to allow his eyes to adjust. When he could finally see again, he turned to face the direction of the door. Striding out, his eyes protested as light from the hallway blinded him momentarily.

The remaining remnants of the First Order had set up base on a remote planet in the unknown regions near Kalee. Though a great number of the First Order were destroyed when their Starkiller base blew, they had enough to build a new base. They probably had about as much as the Resistance did without the Republic's help.

When they blew the Hosnian system, Ben had felt as though he was betraying everyone who raised him. When the order was given, he knew the faces of those he met as a kid were going to die. Ben had visited the planets on the Hosnian system on many occasions as a child. The Republic was set up there when he was only a baby, and his parents were deeply involved in the creation of the government. Those who had smiled down at him, given him treats when his parents weren't looking, were going to die because of him.

The worst part was the disturbance in the force. He had never experienced anything like that before. The gut wrenching cries and the ice cold fear of billions of people sliced through his core. It burned his insides as the planet's burned in mere seconds, while. And he stood there passively and watched it all. Cursing himself with watching the planet he condemned shatter into infinite pieces.

In that moment, he had only briefly thought about his actions, letting his mask and Dark affinity conceal his true self. These covers were becoming more and more a part of himself. The Dark and the Light worked in him like the day worked with the night. Uncle Luke had thought this balance curious and dangerous in the beginning. That one day, he might lose that balance.

Uncle Luke may have been right.

He had almost killed his father. The man he both despised and loved. He had almost given in, and followed the orders Snoke had given him. Ben had feared his mask, knowing the power and strength from the Dark side fueled him. But his father still breathes.

Han Solo had never had any force capabilities. He had never understood the internal struggle that weaved its way around Ben's soul every day. Neither had Ben's mother. His parents had only seen the Light in him. His uncle was the only one who had listened to both sides of Ben and understood and accepted both. Because he wasn't just one part of the force, he was both. He was the balance, the pendulum in the middle of it all that weighted the Dark and Light. His uncle had once told him that without darkness, there was no light. And without light, there was no dark. The two had to coexist to bring balance to the force. Unfortunately, the Dark side had birthed more malevolent creatures in the past. The malevolence making those with the Dark side falling victim to corruption. The force wasn't corrupt. It was the people, like the Sith, that were corrupting the force.

Ben hoped that he would not become a creature of the night like the Sith. The more he played the role, the more he feared his fall.

He had to carry out his Uncle's plans. The weight of the galaxy was on his shoulders, as it was proven with the Starkiller that an incorrect balance in the force led to destruction. That's why he was so adamant about keeping the map of his Uncle's whereabouts out of the hands of one person. When his uncle gave the map to Ben, Ben had split it in two, keeping one to himself, hiding it in the old Empire's databases and placing the other in his Uncle's droid. Keeping the pieces on the two opposite ends of ideologies seemed like a good idea in the beginning. But it had just led to more destruction. Destruction that had started way before all the young Padawans being taught by his uncle were brutally murdered. Ben and his Knights of Ren were too late to save the Jedi academy. So he had killed the murderers and took the credit for the terror. The destruction needed to be stopped. But he was helpless. Something that used to be so black and white had manifested itself into a thousand shades of gray.

Unbeknownst to them, the Resistance had the entirety of the map in their hands. And a new force-user. It hadn't taken him long to realize exactly who the new girl was and the destiny that followed her. Their plan had to change, adapt to the new conditions he felt in the force. Certainly Snoke would feel this shift, and make him more wary than ever of him. It needed to be controlled. And he needed his uncle to regain control of the situation.

Which left him only one choice.

It was time to awaken the droid.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Would you believe me if I said that Summer came and I lost all motivation to do anything?

Chapter 6

 _Han POV_

Han had felt the _Falcon_ land and not thirty seconds later, Leia was on top of him. Han had held his wife until he felt the worry and anxiety seep out of her. He kept his own fears to himself, knowing that she shared them, and wanting to have a moment of peace with his wife before reality came crashing back.

Han was so focused on listening to her breathe steadily that he almost didn't catch it when her chest rumbled on top of him as she spoke.

"Huh?" He shook himself out of his reverie.

Leia's head was currently on his chest, and she tilted her head upwards to speak more clearly. "What are we going to do?"

Her voice spoke so steadily, but Han caught the fragility in her voice. Han couldn't help but remember the time four years ago when they were in a similar position and she had asked the same question of him. Han didn't know what to say to her. Either times. He debated whether it was better to be truthful or hopeful in his response. He settled for a bit of both.

"Well, first thing is that when we're standing up again, I'm gonna kiss you."

The small timbre of Leia's laugh resounded through his entire body.

"Then, you're gonna debrief the Resistance after this successful mission. People are gonna wanna celebrate. We're gonna join them for an hour. Then we're gonna retire to your room. We're going to get some much-needed sleep. And then when we wake up, we're going to come up with a plan to save our son."

Leia was quiet as she seemed to absorb Han's plan. It was only when Han started to worry if Leia had fallen asleep, did she respond.

"Why are you still alive?"

"Would you rather I be dead?" Han teased her lightly.

Leia didn't appreciate his insinuation, and she jabbed him lightly in the arm. "You know what I mean."

Han sighed. "All I know is that Ben wants us to trust him. On what, I'm not sure. But he faked my death, Leia. Why not just let me go? Why pretend to kill me?"

Leia considered this as her hand smoothed small circles on the front of Han's shirt. "He had to put on a show. It was Snoke, it had to be."

"Am I supposed to pretend I'm dead or somethin'? Should I hide out on the _Falcon_ until we know more?"

The tiny circles Leia had been imprinting on him stopped. "I don't know."

Suddenly, Leia's warmth was gone. Confused, Han leaned up on his elbows to watch his wife perch herself on the edge of the med bunk, her hands gripping the side of the bunk. Her face was coated with worry as she ran through calculations in her head. Han raised the rest of the way up to sit beside her.

"Well, sweetheart, if he didn't want anyone to know, he would have told one of us. As far as we know, only Ben and Snoke know I'm supposed to be dead. People won't be looking for me to be otherwise. And if they are, it's going to be a while before that news travels around the galaxy."

Han studied Leia as she added these insights to her calculations. Her face still painted in worry, she whispered, "Ben…"

"Asked us to trust him. Whatever his plan is, he's probably going to act on it soon."

"What if something happens to him?" Leia turned her face to look at him, and Han wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her into his lap. She sat there, her frame taunt and stiff.

Han felt him say, "He's a big boy. He can take care of himself."

But similarly to his wife, Han worried for his son. What had happened gave a newfound hope to him and Leia about their son. It was what bonded them together right now. They could both see a future now where their family was back together.

A dark thought wormed its way into Han's mind. What would happen to them if their hope was lost? Would he have to leave again? He had never wanted to do so the first time, but Han was so sure that Leia didn't want him around after they heard about Ben's turn to the Dark side that his trips just kept getting longer until one day he just didn't come home. Han had hated every day he was away from her. But he hated it more when she looked at him like she had during those first few months after Ben's turn. In his mind, he picked hating himself over watching Leia hate him. Their separation had hurt both of them on too many levels to count.

Han tightened his arms around his wife as he contemplated what he could do to erase that time apart. He had missed too much. He had missed watching her become a general. Missed the overnight appearance of new crinkles around her eyes. Missed being her rock on the anniversary of Alderaan's destruction for _four_ years.

Never again, Han vowed. Never again would he miss anything of importance. If that grounded him for a while, he would suck it up, because no matter how much he loved the feeling of flying through space, he loved Leia more. He loved his family more. He was a fool for thinking he could escape his problems. They always found him in the end. But every time, Leia was there to rescue him.

 _Gods_ , he loved her.

The last time Han was in the Resistance's command center, there were frantic busybodies hurrying around in terror of their imminent demise. Now, the busybodies were still. Leia had posted herself right in front of the main table as she addressed the command center of their success and thanked her fighters for their hard work in the battle.

Han stood off to the right, leaning nonchalantly against the wall. He had a direct line of sight to Leia, and his gaze never wavered from her face. He was currently re-memorizing her face as she spoke to her people. Too much time apart from her left his memory sullied. _Never again._

Really, he usually tuned out these boring debriefings, and he smiled knowing that at least no matter how much time had passed, he still hated these things. The only reason he was here was because of Leia. She asked him to come, and if he was being honest, he was reluctant to let her out of his sight.

A large display of hooting and hollering and clapping snapped Han back into the present. The meeting was over and the celebrations were beginning. Han smiled watching Leia's features pull up in her pride and happiness. She chose that moment to look directly at him and Han knew that she was glad to see him among her people. They never needed the powers of the Force to communicate with one another, something that Han had always took pride in. He could read his princess like a book. Most of the time.

Han watched victoriously as Leia slowly made her way to him; stopping to shake hands and give thanks to those she passed. Her eyes kept flitting over to him, tracking his movements that would inevitably lead him to her.

When he slid up next to her, she was talking to old man Ackbar. The leader clasped Han's hand and patted him on the back.

"Solo. Nice to see you around again."

"Likewise," Han grinned.

Ackbar then turned to Leia and quickly excused himself. With Ackbar's back to them, Han circled his arms around his wife.

"This hour needs to go by faster," Han complained.

Leia merely smiled brightly at him while scooting closer into his embrace. "Feels like old times."

"What? Me complaining about being in public when I'd rather be in private with my wife?"

Leia rolled her eyes dramatically. "No, I mean the war." She sighed and continued in a lower voice. "Us, fighting only to make up again. The celebration after winning a battle. The Empire trying to kill us at every turn. You, somehow defeating the odds of death." She nudged him playfully. "I feel like we're young again."

Han grinned. "Ain't nobody getting old here, sweetheart."

"We'll have to test that theory when our hour is up, hotshot." Leia winked suggestively.

Han's retort was cut off by the sudden appearance of a golden droid with an obvious death wish. _This_ felt like old times. 3P0 had a knack for interrupting things.

"General! General!"

Leia sighed and untwined herself from Han. "Yes, Threepio?"

"R2-D2 has awoken and claims he has something you need to see!" The droid shuffled to the command center's table, Leia and Han in tow.

"What is it Threepio?" Leia questioned, settling her eyes on the now-active R2 droid. "Artoo? What has happened?"

The blue and white droid squeaked and squawked, and 3P0 eagerly translated.

"Artoo Detoo says he has the rest of the map to Luke Skywalker! He also says that he can show it to you now, if you'd like."

Han watched as Leia's body straightened in anticipation. "Show me."

Those celebrating in the Command Center stopped and stared as a large blue map illuminated the room. With one look, Han knew that this was the missing piece from the map that those kids and BB-8 had found. Seemed like he wasn't the only one to catch on either.

The orange and white ball sprang into action as it projected its own piece of the map, aligning the two projections to show one giant, full map.

"This is uncharted territory, Princess," Han recognized. He turned to Leia as she watched the stars, eyes wandering the line that was drawn directing her to her missing brother.

"Will it work to find my brother?"

Han watched the determination on Leia's face harden her features. "Yeah. It may take a while though. I'll have to update this map to the _Falcon_ , do some work figuring it out. Plot the course on the computer. But yes, sweetheart, it'll work to find Luke."

"Good."


End file.
